Today, Barb is feeling: like her head is going to explode!!!!!!!!
i am sick.
i hate being sick.
i have a headache, a stuffed up nose, a sore throat, a canker sore, coughing, sneezying, aches and pains.
i hate being sick..... alot!
3.29.2004
3.27.2004
Today, Barb is feeling: better than she has in the past few days.
so i have finally gotten to the point where i can talk about Ann (my former chancellor, read back a few blogs and you will know all about her) and not burst into tears and so i think that is a good thing.
but i have a sore throat. my mom says it might not be because i am sick, but because i have been crying all the time which i can totally see happening.
now my sore throat is starting to feel better, but i am not sure if it is because of the cough drops, or the vitamin C or not crying. but now i have a canker sore. atleast i think it is a canker sore. it fits all the descriptions of a canker sore and they say that stress will cause them and that women are 50% more likely to get them than men. but so my canker sore hurts and that means i am in pain also. so what i did was stuck a fruit snack in the bottom of my lip where the canker sore is so i don't run my tounge over it and cause it pain.
i am at work right now and bored out of my mind. Neng said that he might come over and visit and burn some CDs for me!!!!! whee to neng!
i also took some tyenol for the canker sore.
so i have finally gotten to the point where i can talk about Ann (my former chancellor, read back a few blogs and you will know all about her) and not burst into tears and so i think that is a good thing.
but i have a sore throat. my mom says it might not be because i am sick, but because i have been crying all the time which i can totally see happening.
now my sore throat is starting to feel better, but i am not sure if it is because of the cough drops, or the vitamin C or not crying. but now i have a canker sore. atleast i think it is a canker sore. it fits all the descriptions of a canker sore and they say that stress will cause them and that women are 50% more likely to get them than men. but so my canker sore hurts and that means i am in pain also. so what i did was stuck a fruit snack in the bottom of my lip where the canker sore is so i don't run my tounge over it and cause it pain.
i am at work right now and bored out of my mind. Neng said that he might come over and visit and burn some CDs for me!!!!! whee to neng!
i also took some tyenol for the canker sore.
3.26.2004
Today, Barb is feeling: like a very small peice of a much bigger puzzle that she doesn't know how to solve.
i like my daily, 'barb is feeling'
it sets the mood for the coming blog so you know wat to expect.
The World Has Turned and Left Me Here --- Weezer
The world has turned and left me here
Just where I was before you appeared
And in your place an empty space
Has filled the void behind my face
i like my daily, 'barb is feeling'
it sets the mood for the coming blog so you know wat to expect.
The World Has Turned and Left Me Here --- Weezer
The world has turned and left me here
Just where I was before you appeared
And in your place an empty space
Has filled the void behind my face
3.25.2004
Today, Barb is feeling: much sadder than she can really remember feeling in a long time
it is raining outside.
it feels like the whole world is crying with all of us.
today has been such a bad day
i want to yell, scream, rail against the whole world about what happened today.
i want it to be yesterday
i want this tragedy to have never happened
i want ann to still be alive.
i want my chancellor back!!!!!!!!!
i want the strong powerful women who runs this campus with a hard fist and a huge smile back
i want all the yesterdays that i was a happy go lucky kid and didn't have to deal with a death of the chancellor who knew my name.
i want ann back
it is raining outside.
it feels like the whole world is crying with all of us.
today has been such a bad day
i want to yell, scream, rail against the whole world about what happened today.
i want it to be yesterday
i want this tragedy to have never happened
i want ann to still be alive.
i want my chancellor back!!!!!!!!!
i want the strong powerful women who runs this campus with a hard fist and a huge smile back
i want all the yesterdays that i was a happy go lucky kid and didn't have to deal with a death of the chancellor who knew my name.
i want ann back
Today, Barb is feeling: like the whole world is crying with me and River Falls.
http://www.uwrf.edu/calendar/re_0604_lydecker.htm
http://www.kare11.com/news/news-article.asp?NEWS_ID=61491
such a shitty day.
there is nothing that compares to this day on the shit-o-meter
so today at about 10 am this morning, i found out that my Chancellor died. she was in a car accident at 6:40 this morning and she died. Ann Lydecker is now dead.
We no longer have a chancellor.
Ann Lydecker was killed in a car accident.
i keep saying it to myself but it feels so weird, almost like i still expect to see her walking through the campus. she was so nice. she was a great inspiration to all of us students on campus.
she actually knew my name. every friday she would walk past the information desk and say happy friday barb, and ask how my week was. the chancellor of my college knew who i was. she knew me by name, and now she is dead.
it is like a bad dream. and all the people around me don't understand why i feel like this. they are all happy and in a good mood and i just want to scream at them, "FUCKERS!!!! DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT HAPPENED TODAY? ANN DIED! SHE CARED MORE ABOUT YOUR EDUCATION THAN YOU'LL EVEN KNOW!!!!!!"
Ann Lydecked died today.
She will have a visitation on Monday.
She will be buried on Tuesday.
Ann Lydecker, first woman Chancellor of River Falls, died today. And buried with her will be a peice of my heart.
-barb
http://www.uwrf.edu/calendar/re_0604_lydecker.htm
http://www.kare11.com/news/news-article.asp?NEWS_ID=61491
such a shitty day.
there is nothing that compares to this day on the shit-o-meter
so today at about 10 am this morning, i found out that my Chancellor died. she was in a car accident at 6:40 this morning and she died. Ann Lydecker is now dead.
We no longer have a chancellor.
Ann Lydecker was killed in a car accident.
i keep saying it to myself but it feels so weird, almost like i still expect to see her walking through the campus. she was so nice. she was a great inspiration to all of us students on campus.
she actually knew my name. every friday she would walk past the information desk and say happy friday barb, and ask how my week was. the chancellor of my college knew who i was. she knew me by name, and now she is dead.
it is like a bad dream. and all the people around me don't understand why i feel like this. they are all happy and in a good mood and i just want to scream at them, "FUCKERS!!!! DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT HAPPENED TODAY? ANN DIED! SHE CARED MORE ABOUT YOUR EDUCATION THAN YOU'LL EVEN KNOW!!!!!!"
Ann Lydecked died today.
She will have a visitation on Monday.
She will be buried on Tuesday.
Ann Lydecker, first woman Chancellor of River Falls, died today. And buried with her will be a peice of my heart.
-barb
3.24.2004
Today, Barb is feeling: the burn!
went to It Figures last night, and can i just say, I LOVE IT!
it is so much damn fun! Teresa and I decided to go three times a week at 4:30 each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. We are going during those times every week and the rest of the world will just have to revolve around us!
i think i am over Disney now,
but now i have to start looking for a place to live next year.....
I am not sure if i want to do in the dorms.... or the apartment again. it makes it hard when I dont have people who are looking to have a roommate. all the people i know already have roommates for the coming semester
so if, anyone out there in River Falls needs a roommate... PICK ME PICK ME!
went to It Figures last night, and can i just say, I LOVE IT!
it is so much damn fun! Teresa and I decided to go three times a week at 4:30 each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. We are going during those times every week and the rest of the world will just have to revolve around us!
i think i am over Disney now,
but now i have to start looking for a place to live next year.....
I am not sure if i want to do in the dorms.... or the apartment again. it makes it hard when I dont have people who are looking to have a roommate. all the people i know already have roommates for the coming semester
so if, anyone out there in River Falls needs a roommate... PICK ME PICK ME!
3.23.2004
Today, Barb is feeling: rather confused about life in general
So I talked to my mom today about Disney.
Apparently since she is a teacher I am covered in Family Health Insurance and so she really doesn't pay for my insurance, but if i were to go to Disney, it would be $200 a month just in case, for the insurance.
So needless to say, that Disney is out of the question as of right now. Well, that would prolly be forever since i don't think i will be able to do it unless I am a student and i won't be a full time student if i am down there, and so the conclusion is
no disney.
i didn't realize how excited i was actually about Disney until the whole thing had the final kabosh on it. it was weird. like my chest expanded and contracted at the same time and i got really sad.
needless to say, i didn't really think that not being able to go would make me so sad.
well, it is the perfect day because i get to go and work out and then i teach piano and then i get to go to Olive Garden with Erin and that will be fun to catch up with her for a while.
it was kinda cute though, my mom was talking to my dad on the phone and to me online, and she said,
"Just so you know, Dad and I talked about all the different possibilites. You going with no insurance was not one of them. Just keep your eyes and ears open for the next option. We are not trying to ground you."
isn't my mom cute?!?!?
i think so atleast. so maybe i should start looking at the different stuff we have around here. i know that i could like go to Scottland, sometime... or maybe take a semester and go to like New Zealand. For a small school, we have a good number of things that I might be able to do.
later yo!
So I talked to my mom today about Disney.
Apparently since she is a teacher I am covered in Family Health Insurance and so she really doesn't pay for my insurance, but if i were to go to Disney, it would be $200 a month just in case, for the insurance.
So needless to say, that Disney is out of the question as of right now. Well, that would prolly be forever since i don't think i will be able to do it unless I am a student and i won't be a full time student if i am down there, and so the conclusion is
no disney.
i didn't realize how excited i was actually about Disney until the whole thing had the final kabosh on it. it was weird. like my chest expanded and contracted at the same time and i got really sad.
needless to say, i didn't really think that not being able to go would make me so sad.
well, it is the perfect day because i get to go and work out and then i teach piano and then i get to go to Olive Garden with Erin and that will be fun to catch up with her for a while.
it was kinda cute though, my mom was talking to my dad on the phone and to me online, and she said,
"Just so you know, Dad and I talked about all the different possibilites. You going with no insurance was not one of them. Just keep your eyes and ears open for the next option. We are not trying to ground you."
isn't my mom cute?!?!?
i think so atleast. so maybe i should start looking at the different stuff we have around here. i know that i could like go to Scottland, sometime... or maybe take a semester and go to like New Zealand. For a small school, we have a good number of things that I might be able to do.
later yo!
3.22.2004
Today, Barb is feeling: like her eye lids are going to end up super glued to the bottom of her eye lashes.
in other words, barb is tired.
so i might be going down to Disney for the equivalent of a semester, but i am not sure yet.
my mom needs to talk to the insurance people, since i would not be a full time student and since i am over 21 now. so that means that i would not have health insurance, and that would be BAD. so that is what is going on that front.
i felt so smart in accounting today! i knew like all the answers to all the stuff that she was going over for the first time and i felt so good about myself! maybe, just maybe, there is something to this studying thing that i have heard so much about!
lets see...... what else is going on?
Take Back the Night is coming soon! and there will be more about that in the near future. jsut so ya all know!
i will be back tomorrow sometime....
i have plans for tomorrow now! im excited!!!!!!
after my Business Ethics class, i get to go and see my Little Sister Kayla, and then i have math class
and then at 4:30 i get to go to It Figures with Teresa,
and then after i teach her piano for half an hour,
and then i get to go out to dinner with Erin!!!! who i haven't seen in FOREVER!
and then i will be stopping at home to get my pants that i forgot at home. and then heading back to the ole' RF
SWEETNESS
in other words, barb is tired.
so i might be going down to Disney for the equivalent of a semester, but i am not sure yet.
my mom needs to talk to the insurance people, since i would not be a full time student and since i am over 21 now. so that means that i would not have health insurance, and that would be BAD. so that is what is going on that front.
i felt so smart in accounting today! i knew like all the answers to all the stuff that she was going over for the first time and i felt so good about myself! maybe, just maybe, there is something to this studying thing that i have heard so much about!
lets see...... what else is going on?
Take Back the Night is coming soon! and there will be more about that in the near future. jsut so ya all know!
i will be back tomorrow sometime....
i have plans for tomorrow now! im excited!!!!!!
after my Business Ethics class, i get to go and see my Little Sister Kayla, and then i have math class
and then at 4:30 i get to go to It Figures with Teresa,
and then after i teach her piano for half an hour,
and then i get to go out to dinner with Erin!!!! who i haven't seen in FOREVER!
and then i will be stopping at home to get my pants that i forgot at home. and then heading back to the ole' RF
SWEETNESS
3.21.2004
3.18.2004
Today, Barb is feeling: like a criminal
so i have a big posting for tomorrow, but i found this and love it!
from the LiberalOasis.com
The Sandbox
Humor Column by Sally Sheklow
The New Axis of Evil: Gays, Pets and Furniture
"Does that mean you have to allow a man to marry his pet or a man to marry his chair?"
—The Honorable Jon Bruning, Attorney General of Nebraska, regarding marriage equality
Does removing legal barriers to spouses of the same sex really put us on a slippery slope to pet and chair marriage? Don’t get me wrong, I’m as fond of a slippery slope as the next dyke.
But I don’t buy marriage equality being the slip ’n’ slide to hell.
Still, I could see marrying my cat.
We have a fulfilling, egalitarian relationship, even though I’m a lot older and have opposable thumbs.
I adore her, and the feeling is mutual.
She cuddles me. She touches her nose to mine. She leaves her regurgitated kibble exactly where my foot will land when I step out of bed.
The cat is into me.
I wouldn’t have a problem with marrying my chair either.
My favorite chair never lets me down. It’s accommodating yet independent enough to stand on its own four legs.
My chair has comforted and sustained me through many a trying time.
It unselfishly shares its collected spare change and popcorn kernels. My chair accepts me for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, good times and bad, happy and sad.
I trust my chair will support and honor me as long as we both shall live.
If the slippery slope leads to chair-marrying, go ahead and sign me up.
Not that the chair is eligible for much in the way of retirement benefits or social security, or that a floral recliner would be especially judicious if it ever had to oversee my estate.
But were I to wind up in the emergency room, say, I wouldn’t mind opening my eyes to the soothing sight of my beloved chair.
If we are on a slippery slope for real, and marriage equality is really a crazy wild ride into chaos and eventually polygamy—as constitutional amendment supporters predict—I can state unequivocally, I would be willing to marry both my cat and my chair.
If it comes down to the law allowing me to marry the woman I’ve been sharing a bed with for sixteen years and jump the broom with my cat (she’s a good jumper!) and get hitched to my chair (it’s stable!), I’m certain my cat and my chair would be fine with that.
All three objects of my affection accept my multiple devotion, and they are only rarely just a teensy bit jealous when one gets more attention than the other (except my chair -- never jealous!)
So what’s the hullabaloo?
Homos aren’t all that scary anymore. Years of exposure from the likes of Ellen and the Queer Eye guys and all of us coming out have made an impact.
These days most people tend to like us. Regular folks aren’t feeling threatened the way they did back when they believed we were recruiting their children and doing all the other icky things the OCA said in the voters’ pamphlet.
Apparently marriage between loving same-sex partners doesn’t engender enough panic in the public. To get folks seriously lathered up, now the bigots have to throw in the cat, too (she doesn’t like being thrown), and the poor chair.
As if marrying a pet or a chair is some deep-seated nightmare -- the looming terror people will do anything to avoid, even vote to amend the constitution.
A cat in a bridal veil. A chair in a tux. Ooooh! The new Axis of Evil.
Did we think we’d ever see the day when affection for pets and chairs would rattle the public cage more than two sissyfaggots or two bulldaggers dropping out of the patriarchal paradigm to make it with each other? We have come a long way, baby!
so i have a big posting for tomorrow, but i found this and love it!
from the LiberalOasis.com
The Sandbox
Humor Column by Sally Sheklow
The New Axis of Evil: Gays, Pets and Furniture
"Does that mean you have to allow a man to marry his pet or a man to marry his chair?"
—The Honorable Jon Bruning, Attorney General of Nebraska, regarding marriage equality
Does removing legal barriers to spouses of the same sex really put us on a slippery slope to pet and chair marriage? Don’t get me wrong, I’m as fond of a slippery slope as the next dyke.
But I don’t buy marriage equality being the slip ’n’ slide to hell.
Still, I could see marrying my cat.
We have a fulfilling, egalitarian relationship, even though I’m a lot older and have opposable thumbs.
I adore her, and the feeling is mutual.
She cuddles me. She touches her nose to mine. She leaves her regurgitated kibble exactly where my foot will land when I step out of bed.
The cat is into me.
I wouldn’t have a problem with marrying my chair either.
My favorite chair never lets me down. It’s accommodating yet independent enough to stand on its own four legs.
My chair has comforted and sustained me through many a trying time.
It unselfishly shares its collected spare change and popcorn kernels. My chair accepts me for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, good times and bad, happy and sad.
I trust my chair will support and honor me as long as we both shall live.
If the slippery slope leads to chair-marrying, go ahead and sign me up.
Not that the chair is eligible for much in the way of retirement benefits or social security, or that a floral recliner would be especially judicious if it ever had to oversee my estate.
But were I to wind up in the emergency room, say, I wouldn’t mind opening my eyes to the soothing sight of my beloved chair.
If we are on a slippery slope for real, and marriage equality is really a crazy wild ride into chaos and eventually polygamy—as constitutional amendment supporters predict—I can state unequivocally, I would be willing to marry both my cat and my chair.
If it comes down to the law allowing me to marry the woman I’ve been sharing a bed with for sixteen years and jump the broom with my cat (she’s a good jumper!) and get hitched to my chair (it’s stable!), I’m certain my cat and my chair would be fine with that.
All three objects of my affection accept my multiple devotion, and they are only rarely just a teensy bit jealous when one gets more attention than the other (except my chair -- never jealous!)
So what’s the hullabaloo?
Homos aren’t all that scary anymore. Years of exposure from the likes of Ellen and the Queer Eye guys and all of us coming out have made an impact.
These days most people tend to like us. Regular folks aren’t feeling threatened the way they did back when they believed we were recruiting their children and doing all the other icky things the OCA said in the voters’ pamphlet.
Apparently marriage between loving same-sex partners doesn’t engender enough panic in the public. To get folks seriously lathered up, now the bigots have to throw in the cat, too (she doesn’t like being thrown), and the poor chair.
As if marrying a pet or a chair is some deep-seated nightmare -- the looming terror people will do anything to avoid, even vote to amend the constitution.
A cat in a bridal veil. A chair in a tux. Ooooh! The new Axis of Evil.
Did we think we’d ever see the day when affection for pets and chairs would rattle the public cage more than two sissyfaggots or two bulldaggers dropping out of the patriarchal paradigm to make it with each other? We have come a long way, baby!
3.11.2004
special thanks to my aunt becca for that joke that i posted!!!!
guess what?
spring break is only one day away!!!!!!!!!!!
yea yea yea!
gotta go and finish homework so i can go home and get some sleep before i have to work in the morning, and then class and then i get to work for Neng! yes ladies and gentlemen, barb gets to work from 8 am until noon and then again at 2:30 until 5! and tomorrow is PAY DAY!
guess what?
spring break is only one day away!!!!!!!!!!!
yea yea yea!
gotta go and finish homework so i can go home and get some sleep before i have to work in the morning, and then class and then i get to work for Neng! yes ladies and gentlemen, barb gets to work from 8 am until noon and then again at 2:30 until 5! and tomorrow is PAY DAY!
3.10.2004
RAAAAA
i hate this, like i kinda feel like i am on a boat sometimes!
my ears are plugged up and so i can only hear like half the noise level and it makes talking to people in a crouwded area very diffucult.
i called my doctor and set up an appointment wiht them, and i made an appt for tomorrow, but like, after a half an hour, i couldn't take it anymore and i called them back and got an appt for today at the latest time, but i still have to leave my acct. class early. i was trying to not do that, but my ear hurts and i can't take it any more!!!!!!!
i hate this, like i kinda feel like i am on a boat sometimes!
my ears are plugged up and so i can only hear like half the noise level and it makes talking to people in a crouwded area very diffucult.
i called my doctor and set up an appointment wiht them, and i made an appt for tomorrow, but like, after a half an hour, i couldn't take it anymore and i called them back and got an appt for today at the latest time, but i still have to leave my acct. class early. i was trying to not do that, but my ear hurts and i can't take it any more!!!!!!!
I got this in an email from chirstie and i just LOVE it!
A teacher in a small Texas town asks her class how many of them are
Bush fans.
Not really knowing what a Bush fan is, but wanting to be liked by the
teacher, all the kids raise their hands except one boy, Johnny. The teacher
asks Johnny why he has decided to be different.
Johnny says, "I'm not a Bush fan."
The teacher says, "Why aren't you a Bush fan?"
Johnny says, "I'm a John Kerry fan."
The teacher asks why he's a John Kerry fan.
The boy says, "Well, my mom's a John Kerry fan, and my dad's a John Kerry
fan, so I'm a John Kerry fan!"
The teacher is kind of angry, because this is Texas, so she says, "What
if you're mom was a moron and you're dad was an idiot, what would that
make you?"
Johnny says, "That would make me a Bush fan!"
A teacher in a small Texas town asks her class how many of them are
Bush fans.
Not really knowing what a Bush fan is, but wanting to be liked by the
teacher, all the kids raise their hands except one boy, Johnny. The teacher
asks Johnny why he has decided to be different.
Johnny says, "I'm not a Bush fan."
The teacher says, "Why aren't you a Bush fan?"
Johnny says, "I'm a John Kerry fan."
The teacher asks why he's a John Kerry fan.
The boy says, "Well, my mom's a John Kerry fan, and my dad's a John Kerry
fan, so I'm a John Kerry fan!"
The teacher is kind of angry, because this is Texas, so she says, "What
if you're mom was a moron and you're dad was an idiot, what would that
make you?"
Johnny says, "That would make me a Bush fan!"
3.03.2004
3.01.2004
I am not a pretty girl,
that is not what I do.
I ain't no damsel in distress,
and I don't need to be rescued.
So, so put me down punk.
Wouldn't you prefer a maiden fair?
Isn't there a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere?
I am not an angry girl,
but it seems like I've got everyone fooled.
Every time I say something they find hard to hear,
they chalk it up to my anger,
and never to their own fear.
Imagine you're a girl,
just trying to finally come clean,
knowing full well they'd prefer you were dirty...
and smiling.
And I am sorry,
but I am not a maiden fair,
and I am not a kitten, stuck up a tree somewhere.
Generally my generation
would never be caught dead working for the man.
And generally I agree with them,
trouble is you got to find yourself an alternate plan.
And I have earned my disallusionment,
I have been working
all of my life.
And I am a patriot.
I have been fighting the good fight.
And what if there are no damsels in distress?
What if I knew that, and I called your bluff?
Don't you think every kitten
figures out how to get down,
whether or not you ever show up?
I am not a pretty girl.
Don't really want to be a pretty girl.
-Not a Pretty Girl by Ani Difranco
that is not what I do.
I ain't no damsel in distress,
and I don't need to be rescued.
So, so put me down punk.
Wouldn't you prefer a maiden fair?
Isn't there a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere?
I am not an angry girl,
but it seems like I've got everyone fooled.
Every time I say something they find hard to hear,
they chalk it up to my anger,
and never to their own fear.
Imagine you're a girl,
just trying to finally come clean,
knowing full well they'd prefer you were dirty...
and smiling.
And I am sorry,
but I am not a maiden fair,
and I am not a kitten, stuck up a tree somewhere.
Generally my generation
would never be caught dead working for the man.
And generally I agree with them,
trouble is you got to find yourself an alternate plan.
And I have earned my disallusionment,
I have been working
all of my life.
And I am a patriot.
I have been fighting the good fight.
And what if there are no damsels in distress?
What if I knew that, and I called your bluff?
Don't you think every kitten
figures out how to get down,
whether or not you ever show up?
I am not a pretty girl.
Don't really want to be a pretty girl.
-Not a Pretty Girl by Ani Difranco
